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Rewarding compliance in the interaction


Staff member
Sep 6, 2019
Make sure to reward compliance for example when she jumps through a hoop and punish non compliance.

The key is to calibrate the level of reward to level of investment.

When you think it's puttin her on a pedestal I imagine the scenario you are thinking of is a guy that is extremely impressed with even the tiniest but of compliance

Guy: how old are you?

Girl : 21

Guy: omg that's amazing, this is the greatest day of my life.. I'm so happy I met you

Of course the girl is going to think you have no value and you have put her on a pedastool.

The right amount on reward in this case would simply be another hoop (you are giving her more attention and another question) or simply commenting on her age.

I also try to keep my rewards a little varied, like a slot machine, so that it's not entirely predictable.

The biggest mistake I see is people punishing compliance too often, you should avoid this.

I think what might help is realising that attention is reward. You don't have to go overboard, simply keep giving her attention when she complies and if it's a bigger level of compliance you can simply say "nice" ", that's cool" "how adventurous of you" etc etc